Cute Funny Quotes

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Cute Funny Quotes

When a relationship goes flat, so does a couple of sets of car tires.

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A man's go to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.

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Always use tasteful words. You may have to eat them.

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You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?

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I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.

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When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

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Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.

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Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?

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For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

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When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

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Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

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A babysitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

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A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

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Adults are just obsolete children.

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Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

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My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend.

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Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

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If everything seems to be going well you have obviously overlooked something.

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I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

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I myself never feel that I'm sexy. If people call me cute I am happier.

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I like a girl to look relaxed.Tight jeans and rock t'shirts are cute!

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When a ladder was stolen from a store the manager said that further steps would be taken.

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My computer goes down on me more often than my girlfriend.

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Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.

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The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

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you can't have everything....where would you put it?

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I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot..

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If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

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A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

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You haven't lost your smile at all, it's right under your nose. You just forgot it was there.

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All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.

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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

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Adults are just obsolete children.

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Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion.

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Love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends.

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My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

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Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.

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As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.

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"Love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends".

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It has been said that a pretty face is a passport. But it's not, it's a visa, and it runs out fast.

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Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source.

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teachers call it cheating, we call it team work...

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