Funny Christmas Quotes

If you want Funny Christmas Quotes then you have to stop your search here. AllBestMessages.com is all about Funny Christmas Quotes. Just read our new collection of Funny Christmas Quotes.

Funny Christmas Quotes

Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.

***************

Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven.

***************

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.

***************

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live.

***************

Hey Santa, how much for your list of naughty girls?

***************

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.

***************

Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your feet.

***************

Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.

***************

There has been only one Christmas the rest are anniversaries.

***************

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

***************

Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

***************

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus..

***************

You know you are getting old, when Santa starts looking younger.

***************

A wakeup call about the Gift Card Industry and how much money goes to waste each year.

***************

He who has no Christmas in his heart will never find Christmas under a tree....

***************

I wish you could put up some of da Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month..

***************

Isn't it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for - I don't know what exactly, but it's something that you don't mind so much not having at other times

***************

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph

***************

Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas

***************

Christmas is a race to see which gives out 1st your money are your feet.

***************

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white man would be coming in to my neighborhood after dark.

***************

A Christmas shopper's complaint is one of long-standing.

***************

Christmas is a time wen every body wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

***************

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.

***************

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not b a child.

***************

Christmas is a time wen you get homesick - even when yoy are home.

***************

A lovely thing about Christmas is that its compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

***************

Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you some thing to eat? Drive you out in the middle of nowhere and leave you for the dead?

***************

Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist and a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?

***************

From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it.

***************

Anyone who believez that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.

***************

"I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph."

***************

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

***************

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

***************

The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.

***************

"Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live."

***************

Funny Christmas Quotes

Now AllBestMessages.com take care all your needs for quotes. Our research team do research and collect best quotes at one place. We keep updating our site All Best Messages regularly for Funny Christmas Quotes and good christmas quotes. Pleasel recommend this site to your friends if you like allbestmessages collection of Funny Christmas Quotes and famous love christmas quotes. Please bookmark allbestmessages and keep visiting again and again for best quotes.

Sms Categories

Funny Christmas Quotes

Funny Christmas Quotes

Funny Christmas Quotes

SMS Of The Day

Email:

Quotes Collection

Poems Collection