Rude Valentine Poems

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Rude Valentine Poems

Hearts are red
Clubs are black
come over here
and fill my.....
Roses are red
Carnations are white
I�ve been to the chemist
how about it tonight!

***************

I love you baby,
I have really really missed
But all that time you were away,
I was sleeping with your sister!

***************

Sweet Comic Valentine
U Make Me Smile Wid My Heart

U're Looks Are Laughable,
Unphotographable

Yet U're My Favorite Work Of Art
Is Ur Figure Less dan Greek

Is Ur Mouth A Little Weak
Wen U Open It 2 Speak

Don't Change A Hair 4 Me
Not If U Care 4 Me

Stay Little Valentine Stay
Each Day Iz Valentine's Day

************

I said 2 u, "Oh, plz b mine;
B mine 4ever, Valentine."

I mst have seemed like quite a fool,
Although I thought I was bing cool.

I swore dat we would never part,
As I put my hand upon my heart.

Had I been thinking wid my head,
I'd probably have fled instead.

************

If I were a key, I would lock u;
If lightning, dan I would shock u

If I were a pier I would dock u;
If I had a band I would rock u.

If I were a spoon, I would feed u;
If I were a house, I would deed u;

On Valentine's Day, I mst plead u,
Valentine, I really need u!

************

4 months I've sat & held it in,
It choked inside & hurt like sin.

It made me sweat & steam & stew,
Whenever I caught sight of u.

Thnx goodness Valentine's Day has come;
If I held it longer, it would strike me dumb.

Dis day I'll say it, come rain or shine...
Will u b my Valentine?

************

Roses r straight,
Violets r twisted,

Bend over luv,
U're about 2 get fisted.

Roses r crap,
Violets r wanky,

Oooh I've jst come,
Pass me a hanky.

************

Another luvr's day passes by my way,
Leaving my soul in undisturbed yearning,

Ones held in my heart r absent these days,
Gone wid my bidding, will I never stop learning?

Long have I witnessed others joining,
As I hold back from da brink of luv,

Possibilities 2 often disappointing,
Thus I remain da untouched dove.

Happy Valentine Day !

************

Since my Valentine got a computer,
My luv life has taken a hit.

Nothing I say is important,
Unless it's a byte or a bit.

My life has bcume quite a trial,
Since my Valentine got a computer.

If I want her 2 care about me again,
I guess I'll have 2 reboot her.

************

If I am da 1st 2 go
I will wait 4 u in da place
Where da crowns of Angels glow

If I go first bcoz I lost da fight.
I will b waiting wid da Father.
Where da tunnel opens in2 light.

If I am da 1st one dare.
I will await u in lush meadows.
Where heady perfume fills da air.

Happy Valentine Day !

************

I miss u terribly dis day of luv,

Miss u wid a wound that stabs & aches..
I see da luv around me, & it takes.
So much strength simply jst 2 move..
Soon, soon, my luv, this waiting will b done.

U & I will have wat we desire..
On days like dis we'll sit beside da fire,
Undoing all da pain of days long gone.

************

Rude Valentine Poems

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